How often do you hear the words, “You wouldn’t believe what happened to me today…” followed by all the problems they faced?
Our language is such an integral part of our life, we take it for granted. We use it all the time to communicate and when you really pay attention to it you realise that the language you use shapes your world.
So, when you want to change your world, change your words.
You wouldn’t believe what happened to me today…I got up late because the alarm didn’t go off. I had to have a cold shower because the boiler has gone on the blink. I got to the station and just missed my train and I was late in to work for my meeting. I stopped for my usual coffee and as I left the shop someone bumped into me and I spilt half of it. And all of that was before I started work!
All this story does is focus on the negatives and the misery of the morning and bypasses any positive aspect of the morning. Imagine thinking like this all the time; it will have a profound effect on your state, your behaviour and subsequently your future experiences.
Experiment with Reframing
A simple approach called Reframing can help change your attitude. Reframing is like taking an old photograph and putting it in a new frame, this changes how photograph looks.
To do this, reflect on what you can be grateful for and how any misfortune could be considered an opportunity.
- I got up late because the alarm didn’t go off -> I am fortunate to wake up and enjoy another day in my life
- I had to have a cold shower because the boiler has gone on the blink -> I am fortunate to live in a place where clean running water is always available
- I got to the station and just missed my train -> I was able to get a seat on the next train
- I was late in to work for my meeting -> This gave my colleague the opportunity to step up and cover for me.
- Someone bumped into me and I spilt half of it -> At least I still had half of my coffee!
It is a simple approach yet it takes practice if this is not something that comes naturally. If it does seem a bit tricky at first, imagine what you would say to a loved one or best friend who was talking in this way.
Also, remember you have a choice. You can choose whether to let those things outside of your control affect you or you can choose to focus on what you can control – your mind-set.
Start with the premise that Life is Good and look through those glasses – they can even be rose-tinted if you like. When you do that it saves you a lot of stress, anxiety and frustration. Any other approach is only hurting yourself!
What are you going to do differently now? Your future world is in your hands…
If you would like to understand more, sign up to my website or come along to one of my events. Like riding a bike, you can learn how to do it by reading a book, you can listen to a webinar but the real power of NLP is in experiencing it for yourself.
So come and give it a go and Discover the Power of You!
Tracy Ward, Your Catalyst for Change